Are you an overthinker...?

I'm an overthinker and I was often criticised for this.  I didn't understand until recently why I did this.  If you are an overthinker then the following may help you understand and make sense of this.  It certainly helped me.

Quote: Source unknown.  "People often mock overthinkers like we're being dramatic.  Like it's a choice.  Like it's something that we are in control of.  But many of us learned to over-think because it was the only way to stay safe.  It was how we made sense of the unpredictable (often during childhood).  How we stayed one step ahead of the storm.  We weren't just guessing what might happen.  We were trying to protect ourselves from what had already happened too many times.  Overthinking is not anxiety.  It's what happens when your nervous system doesn't believe the danger is over.  It's muscle memory from living in survival mode for too long.  And it doesn't switch off just because life finally got quieter.  It is always there."

This is a powerful and insightful perspective on overthinking. It reframes overthinking not as a flaw or a choice, but as a deeply ingrained survival mechanism.

The passage highlights several key points:

Overthinking as a Learned Response

It emphasises that overthinking is often a learned behaviour, developed in environments of unpredictability or trauma, particularly during childhood. In such circumstances, overthinking becomes a way to anticipate danger and protect oneself.

Distinction Between Overthinking and Anxiety

The text makes a crucial distinction: "Overthinking is not anxiety. It's what happens when your nervous system doesn't believe the danger is over." This suggests that overthinking is a symptom of a nervous system stuck in hyper-vigilance, rather than anxiety itself. Anxiety might be the feeling that accompanies this state, but the overthinking is the mind's continuous attempt to resolve perceived threats.

The Persistence of Survival Mode

One of the most poignant points is that this "muscle memory from living in survival mode" doesn't simply disappear when life becomes quieter. The nervous system, having been conditioned to constantly scan for threats, continues to do so even in safe environments.

Empathy and Validation

This perspective offers significant validation for those who struggle with overthinking. It counters the common dismissive attitude ("like we're being dramatic, like it's a choice") by explaining the profound, often traumatic, roots of this behaviour.

It's a really important way to understand overthinking, moving beyond judgment to a place of empathy and understanding the underlying biological and psychological processes at play.

Does any of the above resonate with you?  I believe it's really important to understand the underlying cause of the things we struggle with.  And to also understand that just because we have 'labels' that doesn't mean we are broken or that these things need to define who we are.  We have to show ourselves kindness and empathy for the way we are.  Acknowledge, understand, and then use the information we gather to help us live our best lives.

Find the joy in your journey.  You are worth the effort.